so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
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