i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
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