is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
