If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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