I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
