she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I love having hate sex.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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