glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
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Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
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I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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