just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
