my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
