i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
