You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
