My brain says no but my pants say off.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize