if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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