I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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