We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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