Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
