He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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