I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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