I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Come share oat with me in your robe
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
