Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.