What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.