I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize