Nicole vs. Life
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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