Welp...herpes.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize