the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
A bitchslap is in order.
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