New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
