id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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