Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
