she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize