your room smells of hookers.
And success
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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