Don't you send me to vm
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
