I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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