I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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