why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
