i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
