Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
