When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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