so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
You ate ashes out of my bong
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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