Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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