My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
