i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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