I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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