we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
