when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
