she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
