I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
