Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
cat food counts as protein by the way
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I wear drunk well.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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