3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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