I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
