So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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