There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
