hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
