we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
